You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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