I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Randomize
