called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
