I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize
