I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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