You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Randomize
