Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Randomize
