I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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