that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
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