butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Randomize
