is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Someone signed my nipple.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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