just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
pray to the hookup gods
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
