Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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