He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
