i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Randomize
