: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
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