If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
