matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
