I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
