..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
