I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
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