The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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