During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
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