is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
