you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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