oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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