TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
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