Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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