i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
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