come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
