the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Randomize
