you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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