It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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