i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
