is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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