no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize