I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
