2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
