I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
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