Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
