we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Randomize
