how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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