ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
