Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
It's shark week go big or go home
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
