That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
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