Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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