The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
