But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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