Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
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