I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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