It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
